Service member hugging spouse.

You Can Do This: Your Checklist for Living Positive While Your Partner's Deployed

During deployment, your partner's not the only one who has to step up and serve. Your job is standing tall here at home. The power of being positive can go a long way to supporting your spouse. You'll find it can give you extra strength as well. Try these practical, positive tips.

  • Believe in yourself. Write yourself a note: I can do this. Look at it every day. Lots of couples have been through deployment before and their relationships have become stronger over the years. Yours can too.
  • Try something new, and stay healthy. It doesn't have to be a big thing. Maybe just a walk every day, or a new class. You'll feel stronger and better about yourself.
  • Rally your friends. Connect with other military spouses. Having a network of support is really important now, and it's a good time to reconnect with friends and family you haven't seen in a while. Just make sure they empower you, rather than bring you down.
  • Stick to a routine, but create new family rituals. Always had pancakes on the weekend? Try to keep it up, because kids appreciate the consistency. But maybe you can add new group activities to get everyone involved and jazzed.
  • Don't give into retail therapy. Put aside some savings. It really feels good—honest! Remember, these extra deployment funds won't last forever.
  • It's okay to treat yourself once in a while. Stick to the family finances, but know there's sometimes room to buy yourself an inexpensive little lift.
  • Plan a post-deployment vacation, if you can afford it. This can be something to look forward to and talk about with your family.
  • Check out "These Boots: A spouse’s guide to stepping up and standing tall during deployment" by Jacey Eckhart. It's positive, real-life advice from someone who's been there (five deployments!).
  • Reach out to resources. Family readiness groups connect you with lots of resources and programs to help you power through the stress. 
  • Call or visit your installation's Military and Family Support Center for a host of free programs and information.

This military community of more than five million strong* wants you and your spouse to succeed during your deployment. Reach out for support if you need it. Contact us here at Military OneSource for free, confidential and expert support. We've been there. We're ready to help.

*Source: DMDC, 2014 Demographics Profile of the Military Community